Bohloul laughs (5)

Once some unannounced guests entered his house and ordered 7 types of food, he said, there is nothing at home. One of them said we have heard describing of your hospitality Bohloul replied: it is so late I have given up hospitality, and now I am busy hosting the donkey. If whenever you want, I can host you…? Some one asked him how long do you want to stay in your madness, think a moment and follow your conscious and reason?! He replied: nowadays, following reason undergoes needs too much crazy. A bad natured guy told him: I have a hen that never put egg. Bohloul replied perhaps she plans by not putting egg converts herself as a cock...!
Someone said that one of the enemies of Aaron had power and was known as honest man was beheaded yesterday. Bohloul said: some persons do as domestic hens act and because of that in funeral and wedding unnecessarily have themselves to be killed.
They asked him, what is death? Said death is a reflection of man on the earth, as the blue sky reflected on water.
One day in the palace Aaron, he {Bohloul) was sitting by the window and from behind the glass looked out the window. Aaron said: What do you see out there? Said: I see a large mad crowds who are commuting and they, themselves, don’t know what are they doing and more interesting is that if I was outside and I watched inside the palace I saw the same thing.... . One day Aaron was preaching in a large group of people and falsely introduced himself as the fairest caliph and by duplicity recalled the holy name of Almighty God, someone from among the audience said: i wonder why the Holy name of God is expressed repeatedly by him? Bohloul replied: there is no room for wonder if it was not expressed as habit, sooner than this he would have lost his balance and had fallen. A Mystic asked him why the people are so consent and obeyed? Bohloul replied: because of stupidity. Asked: what is the cause of Stupidity? He Replied: brain emptiness. Mystic asked: what is the cause of brain emptiness? Bohloul replied the hunger? He Asked how? Bohloul replied in a way that, due to starvation, they eaten their brains. Someone asked. If in a desert a hungry lion and leopard see a deer, what will do with it? Replied nothing, because the two will kill each other over the deer.
Once upon a city judge told him: at least confess to your madness that the others know their own task. He replied:
It does not matter, because the one who recognizes his madness, is really a crazy ...!
A Sheriff for a while had resorted to fortune telling and he was running quickly. Bohloul had blocked the way on and said: why are you running so quickly? The man replied: they capture the fortune teller, as Bohloul heard it, rushed into escape. Fortune teller said: why you, are you a fortune teller, too ? Bohloul replied no I am not but till I prove it to them, they will have taken my head skin out of my head!
Some one said i have an enemy so, I am not strong enough to fight him what do you suggest? Bohloul Replied to give it to others. Said how? Bohloul said show me to see. So the other day in the market showed him to Bohloul. Bohloul by a loud noise shouted at people: Oh mankind! This man says , fair and just have left you, non-Muslims, and you are looting slaves of God , what do you say ? When the shopkeepers heard it, rushed into the man and punished him out.
Bohloul said until you have such a helpers, you should not afraid of any enemies.
Bohloul had a bad-tempered wife , once someone told him the very pure and faithful wives will be in Paradise so will be your wife Bohloul replied: it will be easy for me, I'm afraid that my wife because of too much loyalty whish me for heaven and because of that destroys my eternal world, too ! .
He said there are too stupid men these days, they replied: Why? Said the poets have intensified pangyrism!
He was passing by a garden with many trees that had ripe fruits; an arrogant man came forward` that do you know me? Said: no, said I am the owner of the garden, Bohloul said you are not the owner of the garden but is crows and mice!.
He is asked who the stupid man is. Replied that the stupid man is the one does everyone’s work unless his own! …
They asked him what the bitterest thing is. Which is he? Replied: the truth asked: they asked: How can we tolerate this bitterness? Replied: by sweetness of thought.
Once he had not slept for three days and night and was thinking with his own. Some of his friends said: this way of staying away will put your health in danger and I am doubtful about your life he said: this is the other’s sleep that makes my awaking fearful to you.
Some one said if I had many supporters and friends, I would overcome Aaron Al Rashid replied: go after it, the man said: but I afraid that we fail because Aaron is so powerful Bohloul replied: you are not the man of this way because someone who afraid of failure, will afraid of success, too.
A lazy man wanted to go up a mountain, came to him and said: I am going to go up the mountain, what is the best short cut? Bohloul replied: the nearest way is not going. A stupid poet told him that it is for a while that blank paper has scared me and until I do not write some poets on it, I can not stop my fear. Bohloul replied: the papers you have written poets on them has scared us, too.
Someone asked: if the branches of palm tree were on the earth and the roots on the sky, what would happen. Said it is unreasonable. Said: not think correctly and then, answer replied: for untrue question, thinking of true answer will be untrue.
They asked: what is the sign of wisdom puberty? Said: short talks
They asked: what is the duty of human’s eye? He Replied: sometimes seeing by thinking and sometime only see. They asked: what is happiness for? He replied: sometimes in the books and in a time in thoughts.
A greedy man entered his house and sat down in grief. He asked: why are you in such a grief? Said: hi have come across with a grief and I have come to ask you for help. Said: I, myself, need help because I have suffered a problem, too.
A stupid guy asked: how many years the man can live? Replied: I do not know about the man but, I know you will live as much as enough.
A stupid asked: what type of man Aaron is? Last night they were busy describing him. He replied: yes! God take him from me and you. He asked why? The head we have is not as valuable as him.
Once Aaron told him if you give up stupidity and become reasoned, I will give you special helpers. He Replied: whenever the wisdom allows and I adopt stupidity then, I will be entitled to your favor.
They asked: what is the reason for longevity of tongue? He Replied: wisdom limitation. They asked: what is the difference between birth and death? He Replied: the difference is in the way of crying because in birth, the man himself cries while in death people cry.
They asked: what is two plus two equal to? He replied forty. They said you said too much. He replied: when there is over expensive and they sell every goods in ten times price. Then, calculating in number will not be other than this. He said that Aaron Al Rashid is a fair ruler. they said: how do you know it . He replied: he said himself.
One of the Aaron’s servants told him: our blessings are unique in terms of being too much, do not you see it has developed the nation as well as the properties? He replied: Yes, I see, but this progress is like bragging of “ Majnoon" but, in reverse progress ...
A stupid with a hobbled legs, the way was closed at him , showed a large fly that was sitting on his nose, and said: Brother!, I hobble, please fly away this fly from my nose! Said: you limp on your feet, your hands which are not lame, why don’t you send it way by your own? Said: wonderfully! How do I drive away this fly by this foot?! Bohloul thought for a moment and then drove the flies off his nose and then said : You were right, forgive me that I did not know at first glance that both you limp either from above that is , your wisdom or down your feet .
A special courtier of Aaron passed a causeway. Bohloul unintentionally jostled, the courtier went anger {said} stupid! You know who I am? He said: Yes, well, you know, because I have seen you before. Said where? He replied in the house of maniacs. Then, the courtier yelled out hey that ignorant man! I am Aaron’s special companion in court. He Replied: I said ...?!
An oppressive and greedy wrong man fell on his deathbed. Children and relatives gathered around his bed. Because the last minute of agony coming, the man said, I have lived a long life in the wrong and I woke up now ... Bohloul said: what a pity! Now that you bear a heavy dream before you, you have woken up .
One day in a hot desert was travelling. When tired and exhausted got an oasis, the sun sat, and night arrived. A cottage appeared in nearby. He said to himself: Thanks God that after such fatigue, I rest the night in this cottage and give up the all the fatigue of on the way. He brought himself to the cottage and knocked on it and the man who had opened the door on him said: Hello brother, I've come from dawn till now and I am so exhausted. If you let me rest the night in your house and make refreshment, I will be very thankful and I am ready to pay any money out of this. The owner of the house replied: hey! Passenger come in, and rest in this house! I will not received any dinar in return for that, but I will ask you some questions that you ought to answer them; I give you delicious food and a soft bed, but in return for, any wrong answer you give me, I will slap you on the face. Is this a bet-taking?
Bohloul who in that desert does not find a home and nowhere else to live to rest said I accept!
He thought to himself that: as all people say, I'm not so stupid and ignorant to fail to answer the questions and maybe I can and avoid of being slapped, I hope I can provide the right answer.
The host prepared a heavy meal. So, both sat on the tablecloth and ate dinner. After the meal, the host said to Bohloul now, it is time for me to start my own questions. Hey, tell me, what is it?
He said that and showed a cat that was napping on the corner and showed her. Bohloul promptly replied: a Cat. Thought to himself what an easy question, a kid can answer it! The host slapped him heavily and said no cat, it is purity. They both sat for a moment, quiet and no talk and the host again resumed the talk and asked: what is this? While pointing to a cup of water, Bohloul promptly answered: water. The host angered and said no! it is not water, it is goodness and then, slapped him again; after that both of them paused to contemplate. But, the host pointed to fire and questioned: what is this? Bohloul replied: fire. The host said no! It is not fire; it is comfort. Then he slapped Bohloul heavier and said: well, so far you could have not answered my questions may be you can answer my other questions correctly. Then, pointed out to storage on the back and said what this is? Bohloul replied: storage. The host slapped him again and said you don’t answer me again, this is not storage it is heaviness. Bohloul, this time, could not tolerate. Stood up and said:
Dear friend, do you let me go to the yard and breathe fresh air there? maybe my brain does not work as a result of the heat chamber and outside air, turn me on and then, I can give you the right answer to the your questions!
While the host opened the door on him, said: Ok Go, but do not linger long in the yard and come back soon!
Bohloul when got out of the room, the cat came out with him. Bohloul, who was very angry, caught the cat and gathered some dry leaves and attached to her tail, fired them and abandoned the cat.
The fearfully ran toward the barn behind the. Bohloul returned to the room and told host: purity took the comfort and carried it to the heaviness and it is good you take the goodness and kill the comfort with it. The host, who did not know anything about Bohloul’s idea, because what has created and told him could not remember correctly, stares at him and then exclaimed that,: Just tell me what do you want to say? Bohloul said: it was all your minds! And then slapped him four times repeatedly and said your now, your house is on fire and burns and turns into ash, so you're not suppose to weave such a foolish philosophies since then...! Then, packed up his luggage and without looking at the back of his head, came out and went away.
They asked him: Is thinking good or not?
He said, swear God! , I am on doubt in this sense. But, to tell the truth, sometimes thinking is good, and sometimes not thinking. They asked: how? He Replied: when the man is not more than a child, they send him to school. At school, the teacher shout on his head hey child! Guys keep thinking well! Cast your minds! So that what you hear, you can discover ... when grew up and became a young adults, the agents of Aaron take him and force him to serve in the army forces. In the army, the commander chief yells out: Hey, soldier! You are not here to think, what order is, you should accept without thinking...!. As military service era is finished; he marries. This time, his wife says: Hey man! Think well!, I want clothes , food and travel I am not your slave! You were expected to think so … and because he wants to re-think, the Aaron’s forces take him and fall him in the black hole because, he has wanted to think! However, I really do not know which one is good thinking, or not thinking?
They asked: What is life? He replied the life is a high mountain with green slopes and snowy peaks. We are born in its domain, where are clear springs and meadows of grass and basil , we the climb slippery slopes as well as rocky and difficult passages and when we got to the top of its full covered snows , we dies, yes! Death is the life peaks.
They asked: What is man? He replied the man is a limited territory and is ended from east to birth and from west to death.
they asked : what knowledge do you see in the alternation of night and day? He replied this; I see life and death are connected to each other and each one is meaningless without the presence of another and unbearable.
One day a man who was known as a liar, said: my sleep is so light that never sits on my eyes and remains suspended in the air!
Bohloul replied: that is nothing my asleep is so light that even by clashing my eyelids I wake up.
In cities and villages, there was a drought and the earth was yearning for a drop of water from the thirstiness and hordes of people died of hunger every day. One day at dusk, all across the sky was covered by cloud, and it was the promise of rain. The crowd became happy and looked at the sky. The Clouds compacted and lightning was burst out, but still there was no rain. Aaron al-Rashid sent someone and summoned Bohloul up.
When Bohloul arrived Aaron said, what is the reason that the clouds become pregnant and the sky roars, but no rain falls?
Said: Hey caliph! In a vast territory that belongs to God, and you made it your own and have made your dominion wide, the darkness of the night is so thick that the raindrops can not fall ...
the Catchpoll of Aaron had blocked the rural poor helpless way and by the name of the caliph, asked for tax.
The rural sworn that that is has nothing then they searched the corners of his house and when they found nothing, due to wrath, put the fire on his house and the flames flared out at home. The old man because of envoy said: This is not a humanistic action but, savagery and brutality. Bohloul said: On the contrary, it is quite “humanistic", who ever heard of an animal to burn, another animal’s nest house? Or Where has been heard that an animal under the name of another stronger animal from weaker animals crave money and wealth, and because he did not have to pay then, burn his shack and his own nest and put him in the cage. But the man does all these things. So it is not fair that we call human action as non-human.
Asked how the world should see?
They asked: how should we look at world?
Said: as it is.
By which of the eyes?
He Said: through an eye which does not see high as low and low as high.
He Asked: What is the meaning?
Bohloul said: the owners of the eyes are in three types: skeptics, optimists and realists. The optimistic man is the one who sees straw as mountain and the realistic person is the one who thinks the straw as straw and suitable to livestock feed.
Someone said: ' Do you know that man? Said: Yes,.
Said: How man is he?
Said: half well, half bad.
Asked, what does that mean?
Said it means that through his eyes sees the facts, and with his feet flees them away!
They asked: one day in the middle of his lane was sitting and with his sticks was looking around the soils, so what are you looking for? . Said: I was sitting at the window, suddenly I was distracted, I'm looking for it.
One day selfish and raving poet has blocked the way on him and asked him: I , in my poems , for delicacy in rhyme , have much used the word of “mirage “, but I don’t know its meaning correctly. Now, tell me what is mirage?
Bohloul replied: imagine a thirty man in a barren, glowing and warm desert. The poet, then paused and then replied: I do , Bohloul said : now, in a distance further than that thirsty , imagine a cool water spring that in the light of the sun and in the width of the plain is lighting. The poet , after a longer pause , said: I did . Bohloul said: for now , that thirty man in the hope of spring water , hurries toward it, but because It gets there , perceives that what he has seen is not true , and the cool spring he has imagined has not been but a hot area of sand that the reflection of the sky and the sun rays have made them.
Now do you understand that what "Mirage" is?
Poet said, 'No! What you said, are regarded of wonders and do not fit into my mind! Provide another example to me.
Said: Another example: Suppose that somewhere I have stood lonely and I am sad by this loneliness, and I am very eager to meet a man. Poet said: I did.
Bohloul said: at this point, from a far distance, a person appears that comes straight towards me and I, suddenly get pleased that the man I was eager to meet and to be his companion had been found and has rescued me from loneliness and nostalgia. But alas, when he approached and stands in front of me, I see no one, this is called "mirage." We understand the concept of "Mirage" Are you ...?!
Someone said to him that guy is a thoughtful and enlightened man, and as if of their own time, he lives several centuries earlier and is aware of the news future . Said: this is not the condition for enlightenment, one can divide his brain and at the same time, to look at two things. The one who lives in the future, in his time, is not more than a dead and the one who provides news about future, is not aware of sorrows and joys of people living in his own era. The requirement for Enlightenment and thinking is the same as our Imam, Ali (AS)) , says: “ to be the child of your own time”
One day traveling in the desert. An ugly and gruesome riding man appeared. As approached to Bohloul, came down the horse and asked Bohloul for the way. Bohloul said: 'Who are you and where are you going? Said: I am the Great Khan, Genghis Khan, and I seek my tribe! Bohloul was surprised and said: But, evidently, you should have been born several hundred years later, do not you commit wrong?
Rider said, 'No, I'm not wrong. For the bad man like good man the time and place does not mean ...!
One day along with a friend passing road unanimously. On a tree branch, he saw a very colorful bird that was singing a pleasing song, his friend said what is pleasing to the soul the singing of this randy birds...!
Bohloul said yes, but alas, that by this pleasing singing is making a cage for herself ... Meanwhile, a hunter arrived, opened his trap and caught the reader bird and put it in the cage.
They Asked what is the human life is similar to?
Said: is like a two-way ladder that from on the one hand the age goes up and on the other hand, life comes down ...
They asked people on the ground, in what thing are in common? Said on Earth, such a thing is impossible, but in the basement, the two dark soils, the cemetery is common to all human beings.
They asked: What is distance between crying and laughing?
Said the man crying with his eyes and smiles by his lips and between the two, is the human nose ...
A pretentious fool said in a meeting: it disgrace me of being in companionship with the public, because their thinking level is low and mine is high! Bohloul said: it is not an art to be a flood; the art belongs to rain drops that are buried in soil in order to make soil and plants to grow. Someone said I have read the book and I did not understand anything. Bohloul said someone lives on the margins and does not understand anything of the text. One day sitting at home and several pages were put before him and, he was writing quickly.
A friend, dropped in and because saw him said do you write? Replied: the story of my life, said: read what you have written so that I hear.
Replied: it is dismal and must be told. Bohloul began to narrate the story of his life from the birth moment,... passed the maze of childhood and youth adventures as well as the oppressions made by Aaron and his agents, and when he reached the end of the writing, he reiterated last sentence : finally, I got married and my story ends here! His friend said: finished? You have been married for thirty years, why have not you written the description of this era?
Bohloul said because the man after marriage does not have adventure, and what he or she has is destiny, not the adventure, and usually the adventure is written by others not the man himself...