An introduction to the sociology of family from the point of view of Quran (1)

Family sociology is a branch of sociology that discusses family as one of social foundations. In this branch, kinds of families, role and position of each family member, marriage and …are considered as topics that have been paid attention by family sociologists.
Most of the mentioned matters and topics are based on experimental studies and some of them are based on historical documents. Some of them are left from the past and others are considered as the theory of experts of this area.
Heavenly books have not been considered as sources of family sociology and their role has been ignored in the establishment of matters whereas these books, especially Quran, has good reports about family and it elucidates role and position of persons clearly.
In this writing, we will look at matters and topics of sociology briefly and are trying to analyze and evaluate them according to verses of God.

Definition of family

One of basic and important concerns of family sociologists is to present a definition about family. Therefore, a lot of sociologists have presented a definition about family and each one has defined family from a special point of view.

Bregs Velak writes

'' A family is a group that includes persons that have mutual relationship through marital relationship and blood relationship as husband, wife, mother, father, brother and sister, create common culture and live in a specific unit''.

Malek Aiver, one of other sociologists, says

'' Family is a group that has permanent sexual intercourse that leads to production of birth and children training''.
Louvi defines family in this way '' family is a social unit that is created from marriage''.
Hamu writes in his another work '' family is a relationship through marriage, sexual intercourse that confirmed by the community''.
Although the definition of family is accompanied with some changes during time, family and whatever is considered as marital promise is'' the legal relationship of two persons from different gender based on permanent relationships, religious holy and emotional deep relationship that is accompanied with a kind of social contract and cultural important effects''. Therefore, the main meaning of family is accompanied with a kind of social contract, the contact of rights, emotions and society''. Karlsson says '' marriage is a process with the mutual struggle of two persons with legal conditions during ceremony. Generally, their action is accepted by law''. In past, family was more extended and there were two -generation or three –generation families. In other words, couples were as the nuclear of family and children, the parents of couples and even the family of their children along with main family lived in a house with each other. However, at the present time, families are small as much as possible and as soon as children get married, they separate from their father and mother in the aspects of place, job and social position. The volume of change and the duration of change have a special importance in this way. Guld believes that changes are structural and changes are related to actions. He considers the result of social development as conspicuous difference that is found in moods, social structure, foundations and habits.
At the present time, struggle over the definition of family is mostly focused on '' structure'' and '' action''. In other words, the question is whether we should pay attention to structure, the existence of father, mother, single parents, children of bloody relations and marriage. Yonsku distinguishes between the unit of family and family members in 1992 and defines five kinds of distinct family such as nuclear family is a family that includes father and mother and children or single father and mother and their children, stem family is a family that includes father, mother and a child that has got marred along with his or her spouse and children, lineal family, extended family and compound family is two families after divorce.
There are different definitions about family in western societies that are in contrast with the traditional meaning of family. Even two persons that live in a house with each other are considered as a family even though they are not husband and wife. In some countries, they are considered a family with the promotion of the matter homosexuality. In spite of different definitions about the meaning and definition of family, whatever is important is that the construction of social morality, problems, social behaviors and even values come from the foundation of family and family training. Cardiner believes '' If children are trained with playing, soft behavior and kindness, persons will have soft and easy-going personalities in the society. However, if children are trained strictly, they will have harsh personalities in the society''. Arish Form also says '' the grimness of father makes a child weak and makes him or her surrender against strong persons and he or she will look for power and domination against weak persons''. Therefore, we should recognize the science of killing weak persons in persons from their family and the way that parents behave them''.
In spite of fact that there are a lot of definitions about family as some of them were already expressed, they are ambiguous still and the most ambiguous conception is family sociology.

Family definition in Quran

The word '' Al-Asre'' whose Farsi equivalent is '' family'' are not seen in verses of God. Hence, to understand family definition, we should find words that have the same meaning as the word '' Al-Asre'' and they have been used in verses of Quran. One of words that is used in Quran several times and has meanings that are related to the word '' family'' is the word '' ahl''.
In some cases, this word is attributed to the word '' Al-Ketab'', in some cases, it is attributed to the word '' Al-Qara'' and in some cases, it is attributed to the word ''Al-Madine''.
Whenever the word '' ahl'' is attributed to persons in Quran, it will mean ''family''. Hence, considering the use of the word '' ahl'' in verses of Quran, we can achieve definition of family in Quran.

Verses of Quran show that

Spouse is one of family members and the title '' family'' is not used for a man that lives lonely. In some verses, spouse is an exception from a decree in relation to family;
''وَلَمَّا أَن جَاءَتْ رُسُلُنَا لُوطًا سِيءَ بِهِمْ وَضَاقَ بِهِمْ ذَرْعًا وَقَالُوا لَا تَخَفْ وَلَا تَحْزَنْ ۖ إِنَّا مُنَجُّوكَ وَأَهْلَكَ إِلَّا امْرَأَتَكَ كَانَتْ مِنَ الْغَابِرِينَ''
''And when Our Messengers came to Lut, he was grieved on their account, and felt himself powerless (to protect) them: but they said: "Fear thou not, nor grieve: we are (here) to save thee and thy following, except thy wife: she is of those who lag behind''.
In the above sacred verse, the wife of Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) is one of families that has survived. Hence, the sacred verse represents that spouse is also one of family members.
''قَالَ إِنَّ فِيهَا لُوطًا ۚ قَالُوا نَحْنُ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن فِيهَا ۖ لَنُنَجِّيَنَّهُ وَأَهْلَهُ إِلَّا امْرَأَتَهُ كَانَتْ مِنَ الْغَابِرِينَ''
''He said: "But there is Lut there." They said: "Well do we know who is there : we will certainly save him and his following,- except his wife: she is of those who lag behind''.
In the above sacred verse, family of Hazrat Lut (peace be upon him) has been introduced as one of survivors, but the wife of Hazrat Lut (peace be upon him) as the saved family of Hazrat Lut (peace be upon him) is an exception.
''حَتَّىٰ إِذَا جَاءَ أَمْرُنَا وَفَارَ التَّنُّورُ قُلْنَا احْمِلْ فِيهَا مِن كُلٍّ زَوْجَيْنِ اثْنَيْنِ وَأَهْلَكَ إِلَّا مَن سَبَقَ عَلَيْهِ الْقَوْلُ وَمَنْ آمَنَ ۚ وَمَا آمَنَ مَعَهُ إِلَّا قَلِيلٌ''
''At length, behold! there came Our command, and the fountains of the earth gushed forth! We said: "Embark therein, of each kind two, male and female, and your family - except those against whom the word has already gone forth,- and the Believers." but only a few believed with him''.
The exception of the above verse shows that children and spouse are considered as family members. Therefore, these two persons from the dynasty of Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) are considered as an exception.
2. A woman and a man that live together are not called a family because they are not husband and wife legally;
'' وَأَهْلَكَ إِلَّا امْرَأَتَكَ '' '' وَأَهْلَهُ إِلَّا امْرَأَتَهُ''
According to the verses of Quran, the word '' amrah'' is a woman that has got married a woman legally.
3. Family children are considered as family members as Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) called his son as his family;
''وَنَادَىٰ نُوحٌ رَّبَّهُ فَقَالَ رَبِّ إِنَّ ابْنِي مِنْ أَهْلِي وَإِنَّ وَعْدَكَ الْحَقُّ وَأَنتَ أَحْكَمُ الْحَاكِمِينَ''
''And Noah called upon his Lord, and said: "O my Lord! surely my son is of my family! and Thy promise is true, and Thou art the justest of Judges''.
The interpreters of Quran consider Kanan as the family of Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him). It is said about the interpretation of the following sacred verse '' purpose of God is that Kanan is not from the religion of Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) or his purpose is that Kanan is from a religion that I promised for their savory.
''قَالَ يَا نُوحُ إِنَّهُ لَيْسَ مِنْ أَهْلِكَ ۖ إِنَّهُ عَمَلٌ غَيْرُ صَالِحٍ ۖ فَلَا تَسْأَلْنِ مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ ۖ إِنِّي أَعِظُكَ أَن تَكُونَ مِنَ الْجَاهِلِينَ''
''He said: "O Noah! He is not of thy family: For his conduct is unrighteous. So ask not of Me that of which thou hast no knowledge! I give thee counsel, lest thou act like the ignorant''.
Of course, this condition does not mean that according to verses of Quran, family does not devote a man and a woman that have got married legally and have children. Some interpreters consider purpose from the word '' ahl'' in the following verse Aeshe
''وَإِذْ غَدَوْتَ مِنْ أَهْلِكَ تُبَوِّئُ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ مَقَاعِدَ لِلْقِتَالِ ۗ وَاللَّهُ سَمِيعٌ عَلِيمٌ''
''Remember that morning Thou didst leave Thy household (early) to post the faithful at their stations for battle: And Allah heareth and knoweth all things''.
Fakhr Razi writes about the interpretation of the verse
'' فدلّ هذا النصّ علی أنّ عائشة رضی الله عنها کانت أهلاً للنبی ''
Not only sons but also daughters are considered as family members.
Therefore, it is expressed in verses of Quran that Hazrat Maryam (peace be upon her) separated her family;
4. A part from children, wives of children are considered as a family because Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) had three children sit on the ship;
''وَاذْكُرْ فِي الْكِتَابِ مَرْيَمَ إِذِ انتَبَذَتْ مِنْ أَهْلِهَا مَكَانًا شَرْقِيًّا''
''Relate in the Book (the story of) Mary, when she withdrew from her family to a place in the East''.
5. Brothers and sisters are considered as family members because Hazrat Musa (peace be upon him) wanted to appoint a minister from his family and creator introduced Harun that is brother of Hazrat Musa (peace be upon him) as the minister of Hazrat Musa (peace be upon him)
''وَاجْعَل لِّي وَزِيرًا مِّنْ أَهْلِي''
."''And give me a Minister from my family
''هَارُونَ أَخِي''
''Aaron, my brother''.

The motivation of the formation of family

There are different theories about the main motivation of the formation of family. Some believe that the basis of the formation of family comes from the matter of service. For example, Khaje Nasr Al-Din Tusi emphasizes on the principle '' employment'' so that human can become social persons in the book '' Naseri morality'', refers to the kinds of collaboration and cooperation of human and says '' elements, plants and animals can help human from different aspects, but human does not help them; '' human needs elements and plants so that they can be useful for human and persons need the help of each other through servicing …''. Although Khaje pays attention to conceptions and elements such as the need of food and sexual need as material affairs, but it has paid attention to spiritual and cultural elements, namely, affection, for the permanence of the society. Moreover, he refers to natural affection such as the affection of mother toward child and voluntary affection about the ground of affection.
All of intellectuals have tended to utopia and have emphasized on family and its critical importance for the society. It means that the foundation of family is to bear children, to foster children and to make them sociable so that the persons of the society can do more different and complex responsibilities and duties in the society. Family has an important role in the formation of point of views, values and the beliefs of a child and influences on the kind of the relations of persons with other factors and foundations.
Some psychologists such as Froid have tried to limit all desires of women and men toward different gender in sexual desires. Some other psychologists have called affection among couples '' love'' and '' a kind of feeling''. Dr. Hodfield as a psychologist expresses the interpretation of Froid from the word '' love'' in this way '' Froid belives that the complete meaning and conception of the word '' love'' is sexual desire. In fact, he ignores the word '' love'' and uses the word '' sexual desire'' instead of it, does not consider any differences between the lust of a woman and a man and says '' a man is provoked through sexual desire and a woman is provoked through love''. Then he expresses his idea about this case '' love is not a sexual desire along with anger or fear, but it is a feeling and a collection of feelings and excitement toward a thing or a person within a person such as patriotism as it can be understood from its name, it is a feeling whose excitements are about our country. Therefore, love is a feeling that includes a lot of excitements such as selflessness, respect, defending his or her lover and softness, kindness, especially the love of mother toward his or her child, the acceptance of requests and the admiration of lover that are all related to each other''.
Allame Motahari also says '' it is strange that some persons cannot make difference between lust and affection. They imagine that a thing that relates couples to each other is only lust whereas it is the sense of employment and use. In other words, it is the same thing that relates human to foods, drinks and belongings. They do not know that there are other interests in creation and nature apart from selfishness and benefit gaining. Such interests do not come from selfishness, but they come from direct interest toward others''.
Some experts consider the basis of the formation of family ''need'', others consider it '' respect to social contracts'' and still others consider it '' fertility''. But what Quran emphasizes is '' the theory of comfort''. Quran emphasizes on comfort beside wives and the formation of family. Quran believes that you can feel comfortable beside your wife. After young girls and boys form a family, they can feel comfortable. Then Quran expresses '' God has considered interest, friendship and kindness''. In other words, the basis of collaboration with each other should be based on friendship, kindness and mercy. Hence, since the club of family is the center of affection and kindness, it includes relaxing elixir for both husband and wife. This role of family reveals this reality that whenever family is deprived of this affection, its foundation weakens and it may disintegrate and it is one of factors that has made western families in the downgrade of declination and disintegration. According to Islamic religious trains, Husband and wife really want to get married; otherwise, if they marry each other without satisfaction, it will be like a building that is founded in the path of severe storm.
Hence, the underlying of this foundation should be based on the foundation of affection and friendship not on temporary instincts and lusts. In the ups and downs of marital life, this elixir of permanence should be observed and it should change to deeper and more rooted affection and friendship with moral principles, the familiarity of husband and wife with each other and the birth of children. The emphasis of the guidelines of religious texts on friendly relationship between husband and wife can be considered as proof on this topic. Islamic tradition prevents husbands and wives from hash behaviors toward each other and censure it.
One of other important features of the topic '' family'' is bearing children and fostering them. Children can learn to follow the way of the living of parents in the society. In fact, parents are the intermediate of the transfer of the ideals of the society to children. Children become social in the family. Becoming a social person in family is more than the matter of trains at home, learning some rules and accepting or rejecting family performance guarantees. In fact, this process is the beginning of internalizing the culture of the society by family and a child does not separate from that culture generally and he or she will it until the end of his or her life. In other words, apart from family manners, he or she internalizes society manners and they become as a part of his or her personality.
Moreover, the way of behaving a child is the ground of the formation and the fostering of his or her personality. Most of sociologists claim that the effect of childhood experiences is the way that some of its aspects change to '' secondary nature''.

Family formation

Some family sociologists talk about sexual blending in the early stages of human life. For example, Bachofen says '' in early stages of human life, persons lived in groups and with sexual blending (chaos).
In his point of view, family formed after sexual blending and before it, relationships of persons were at disorder and chaos and none of men and women were recognized as couples.
In contrast, some other family sociologists do not believe in sexual blending. For example, Edward Wester Mark that is one of strong opponents of theory of family says '' family always exists and persons never lived in herds''.
It can be understood from the story of Hazrat Adam in Quran that the first theory is false. In this story, Adam and Hava as a husband and a wife lived in a family and Habil and Ghabil were loyal to family life and did not have sexual blending. Since the wife of Habil was pretty and he could not use her, he was jealous of his brother, had animosity toward him and after exalted God did not accept his ghorbani (killing an animal or a person for sake of God), he killed Habil.
''وَاتْلُ عَلَيْهِمْ نَبَأَ ابْنَيْ آدَمَ بِالْحَقِّ إِذْ قَرَّبَا قُرْبَانًا فَتُقُبِّلَ مِنْ أَحَدِهِمَا وَلَمْ يُتَقَبَّلْ مِنَ الْآخَرِ قَالَ لَأَقْتُلَنَّكَ ۖ قَالَ إِنَّمَا يَتَقَبَّلُ اللَّهُ مِنَ الْمُتَّقِينَ''
''Recite to them the truth of the story of the two sons of Adam. Behold! they each presented a sacrifice (to Allah): It was accepted from one, but not from the other. Said the latter: "Be sure I will slay thee." "Surely," said the former, "Allah doth accept of the sacrifice of those who are righteous''.
Interpreters of Quran says about the interpretation of the above verse and mention two factors the animosity of Ghabil with Habil. They have said about the second factor '' Haval gave birth to a daughter and a son in each confinement. The wife of Adam had two confinements; in a confinement, Ghabil and his sister were born and in the second confinement, Habil and his sister were born. The girl of a confinement got married the boy of another confinement. The girl that was born along with Ghabil was prettier than girl that was born along with Habil. When Hazrat Adam (peace be upon him) wanted to have the girl that was born along with Ghabil marry Habil, Ghabil disagreed, considered himself more qualified than his brother and said to his father '' God does not want that the girl that was born along with me marries Habil, but it is your want. Hazrat Adam (peace be upon him) answered '' both of you sacrifice two persons. The victim of one of you that is accepted by God can marry the girl that was born along with you. God accepted the victim of Habil, but his victim fired. Therefore, Ghabil killed his brother due to his jealousy''.
A part from the verses, human nature does not accept sexual blending and human moral does not undergo sexual chaos.

Family and new changes

Family as a foundation has faced to new changes and has endured some changes at the present era and it has a completely new form in comparing to last centuries and decades. These changes include:
3-1-Family economy instead of individual economy and the cooperation of all family members in earning due to economic pressures:
There is no question that the actions and duties of families have changed and industrial and economic developments have highly influenced them. It is possible to study changes with three elements, time, culture and the needs of the era. In the past, most of jobs were done by family members and relatives. A family was located in a districted place and was supervised by relatives and tribe. All family members usually lived in a house along with father and mother and aunts, uncles and other relatives lived in neighborhood. Hence, relatives supervised the youths of families completely. At the present time, conditions are completely different and industrialization has changed the system of family and even the system of job. A family lives in an apartment that they do not know their next-door neighbor. The existence of fixed roles in traditional families such housekeeping and babysitting have changed completely. In the past, traditional family had economic aspect. Hence, the number of children was important, but it is not important now.
The foundation of family is moving toward equality, independence, respect, softness and a kind of feelings democracy. Therefore, industrial world has changed the form of house and family. The formation economic great institutes, large factories, the establishment of large cities and extended migrations are the results of industrialization that have had remarkable effects on family. Generally, there is a long distance between workplace and family in the new discipline of economy whereas there was not such a thing in the past.
2-1-The appearance of cultural new values in family such as education and learning foreign languages
The second topic that should be paid attention is education especially the education of women in the society that has changed the style of the life extremely. In the past, there was at least a school at a village and some girls learned Quran and Farsi literature so that they could recite Quran and read texts such Golestan Sadi. However, with the development of education ministry and superb training and the presence of women in these scientific centers, conditions have changed completely. Especially in recent decades, most of university students in educational and scientific centers are women and even in university entrance examination, the entrance of women to university has increased over fifty percent and the acceptance of girls is more than the acceptance of boys in most majors. There is no question that education, familiarity with new thoughts and theories and the creation of new values will be so effective in the life of persons and families.
On the other hand, universal communications have developed completely and the waves of radio, TV, satellite and Internet are not limited to specific boundary and district and they penetrate anywhere and this gets deeper and more extended day to day and they highly influence the life of persons and families and create new conditions for families.
3-3The serious reduction of financial, material and emotional supports of families toward children
Weakening moral and spiritual matters and the coldness of emotional relationships in the society have left negative effects on the holiness of families. From the point of view of the Islam and Iranian culture, family is considered as a holy club whose aspects are changing. Giving up religious matters can threaten the consolidation of family. Emotions and interests among family members are not only the underlying of the consolidation of family, but it also makes the growth of children possible in such atmosphere. One of main reasons of this topic is the reduction of the holiness of marriage. In the past, equality was important in marriage and parents and the place of life determined it. However, marriage is a contract at the present time rather than a holy affair that forms the foundation of family. Shahid Motahari says about this case '' on one hand, the interests of husband and wife and on the other hand, the interests of parents and children have been formed by creation for the survival and training of future generations. Social emotions of human grow in families and the nature of parents makes the soul of a child calm. When we want to incite the feelings of two persons toward each other, we say that the persons of a nation are brother with each other or say that persons are the member of a family''.
3-4The decrease of the authority of parents in family and its transfer to other foundations such as media and political authority and the change of the action of family
The contemporary sociologist, T. B. Batamur, divides the actions of family into four areas: sexual action, economic action, fertility action and education action. On the other hand, they can be divided into mental and social parts. Other sociologists have recognized four main social actions'' fertility, keeping mature children and making them sociable''. Moreover, Wil Davarant writes in the book '' the pleasures of philosophy'' the specific duty of a woman is to service preserve human generation and the specific duty of a man is to service women and children. They may have other duties, but they follow these two main duties based on wisdom and training''. Religious trains such as the verses of Quran have emphasized on the action of family, especially patents, as two main elements for the preservation of family foundation and they have considered the action of father and mother for the preservation of family important and critical.
However, the present action of family is completely different from its past action. In past, family was producer, consumer and an economic center. Family members met their needs by themselves. They kept pets beside living place and used their milk, meat, skin and fur. They provided their grains, fruits and vegetables from their own fields and gardens. Family was not only the center of training, emotion and comfort, but it was also the center of attempt, work, production and consumption. A warm and emotional club was completely prominent. According to the interpretation of a researcher, a traditional society is permanent, focuses on the enough expanses and its pivot is religious society. However, at the present time, house is usually the place of consumption rather than production. On the other hand, even the situations of consumption have changed. Most of employees and workers eat lunch and even breakfast out of home. Hence, the way of consumption is different from past.

3-5The new system of communications and media

The new system of communications such as Internet and TV has caused that family members live individually. Each person watches his or her own favorite program and family members do not get together. In the past, family members got together and poured their hearts and consulted with each other. However, public media have separated family members and each family member is up to his or her own favorite activity on the corner of house. Little by little, communication among family members becomes less. Of course, in current conditions, most of trains and life skills are trained at home through Internet, satellite, TV and radio. At the present time, the sources of the formation of personality are through communication channels with the society and jobs channels. In the new society of technology, moral and religious unity as the features of traditional society can rarely be observed. Hence, most of values that were issued from families enter families. In other words, in the past, families were the sender of moral religious cultural values, but as time elapsed, they become consumer and each family member brings new values into house from out of house such as high school, university, society and Internet. Therefore, current conditions and the actions of families are completely different from the past.
3-6-The increase of marriages of couples without kinship relationship
In the past, most of marriages happened among women and men that had kinship relationship and were from the same tribe and a big family. But at the present time, most of marriages happen among men and women that do not have kinship relationship and marriages that happen among persons that have kinship relationship are decreasing. University can be a center that women and men can get familiar with each other and marriages may happen among them in the future. Moreover, office, factory, workplace, sport and cultural places, parks and other centers can be too.
Marriage age is completely different from past and economic problems can influence it. If the society faces to more economic problems, persons will marry in higher ages and it will lead to marriages in high ages. When there are economic benefits in the society, incomes are good and getting jobs is easy, marriage will happen easily as well. A thing that can make marriage easy is the matter of job getting. However, unfortunately, in current conditions, one of economic social important problems is the matter of unemployment, especially the unemployment of educated persons. When economic growth decreases, job chances will be few and when unemployment becomes more, marriage will not become common.
Of course, religious texts believe that the formation of family is one of factors getting rid of poverty and the means of achieving facilities and more comfort although most of Muslims consider lack of house, fixed income and specific job as the excuses of stopping getting married and being single. Quran says '' Marry those among you who are single, or the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female: if they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace: for Allah encompasseth all, and he knoweth all things''. As it can be understood, the sacred verse tries to emphasize on the economic working of family and considers the formation of family and marriage effective in wealth increase and guarantees the provision of financial needs of family with two expressions '' Allah will give them means out of His grace: for Allah encompasseth all'' '' and he knoweth all things''.
3-7-The change of imperious and patriarchal relationships to logical and wise relationships (not necessarily woman democratic) and the reduction of man authority
Relationships among family members at home in modern life are completely different from the past. In the past, relationships were patriarchal and imperious, but new marital relationships are moving toward logical and wise relationships. The economic new structure has decreased gender differences between men and women and girls and boys remarkably although this change can be felicitous, but from time to time, this change may change to a problem. The increase of the education of women and getting jobs based on their education can influence the point of view and personality of women. Moreover, education encourages women to work out and women relationships, change in the system of authority in family are influenced by recognition, studies and the education of women. In the past, man was the economic authority of family, was called the bread winner of family and took the economic responsibility of family. But in present conditions, family economy organizes with the cooperation of couples instead of individual economy. Not only do men and women work, but a man has to work in full time in order to meet the expanses of the life. Hence, the conditions of the life are different from the past time.
3-8-The serious reduction of boundaries and gender differences between girl and boy and woman and man
3-9The change of equality among families
The reduction and remarkable change of equality among families that result from the migration of rural persons, citizenship and industrialization have led to the weakness of kinship relationships.
3-10Reaching out worldwide, the outbreak of universal culture and the creation of new manners in effect and being influenced.
Unfortunately, the society and family have separated from religious and spiritual matters, commitment and Islamic morality that are considered as the main factors of family problems. Some social scientist predict that the conditions and form of family will change completely in the west in next decades. Toffler says '' in the future, we will observe temporary marriage instead of the kind of families at the present time''. The weakness of such a relationship can be considered as a shocking danger. There is such a danger for the west at the present time and it does not threaten our society at the present time. According to the culture of universalization and the closeness of societies to each other, the matters and the problems of the west will influence our society. In this way, general training and the extension of public media have increased the general information of new generation and have extended the area of their human and social communications. The most serious result of this is that first new generation becomes social soon and second, only the source of value is not family and its tradition when they want to become social, but they get familiar with new social cultural atmospheres that teach them different values and they become the factors of new needs.
4. Family and new worries
With regarding developments and positive or negative changes in families, there are a lot of worries among family members at the present time that will be mentioned:
4-1Worry about the future of children
There are worry and insecure feeling about the future of children such as superb educations, marriage, job getting and …whereas families have less worry about such affairs in industrial societies. The first worry of parents in house is insecure feeling toward children. As soon as children reach the age of elementary training, finding an appropriate school is the first worry of family. After they are registered in school, if school is far from house, the way of going and coming back school will be the second worry of family. The educational quality of children, the insecure environment of school from moral aspect, classmates and friends that have behavioral problems and other worries until the end of elementary school and guidance school are the main worries of parents. After children get older and graduate from high school, the most important worry is entering university and educational major, the place of university and the conditions of education are other worries of parents. Next worry is job and it can be said that job creation is the most main worry of families. Then marriage is another worry; whom should they marry, when should they marry, what family should they marry and…All of these worries can threaten the comfort, security and intimacy of family members.
4-2The feelings of women toward lack of rights, judicial and legal support
Another worry is about the rights of women in the society. Most of women, whether woman are single or married, feel insecure about lack of enough support about rights, judicial and legal matters and believe that law does not support them years in comparing to the past time.
4-3The worry of leisure time
4-4Lack of planning for the leisure time of family causes that children tend cigarette and addiction.
lack of relationship between the foundation of family and cultural system
Family is not able to accept that their children attend the society and this vacuum has not filled yet. New communication means have simplified affairs and have had a lot of advantages, but they have caused the worries of parents toward their children. For example, the use of teenagers and youths from communication means such as cell phone, Internet, satellite and so forth has caused the worry of families.
5The negative effect of political extremist tendencies in the society on family
The most important worry is about social cultural political matters and problems that influence families because there is a close relationship between family and the society and family cannot be separated from the society. Sometimes, the matters of external policy influence family and spoil friendly atmosphere. As long as political disagreements and competitions are based on the framework of playing rules, they will not only be problematic, but they will also be useful for the society. However, when political disagreements become harsh and severe, do not follow the rules of playing and violate moral principles, they will have dangerous and stressful consequences for the foundation of family. When groups become radical and stand against each other, they make discomfort in the society. Similarly, such a situation may happen for all family members. In some families, such a situation may lead to disagreement and separation. These kinds of political matters can have a lot of effects on the emotional relationships of family and the comfort of family and family will turn into a place for discussion, struggle and disagreements instead of a safe and comfortable place and the comfort of all family members.
5. The coming dangers of families
When social gaps in the society change to ruptures, they can harm social unity, coherence and public trust. These social conditions can influence families and whenever such gaps enter families, they can create a lot of problems for them. A conspicuous problem about this area is disagreements and family argumentations that can result in cold relationship among family members and divorce that threatens the basis of family. Some of these threats threaten quality, family values, but others threaten the basis of family and its survival.
In the western countries, the statistics of divorce is high. For example, divorce in the first marriage is fifty percent in America and in the second marriage, it is sixty seven percent. Although divorce is thirty four percent in European Union, this statistics is higher. In 2005 in England, forty five percent marriages has resulted in divorce. In some societies that traditional customs are more respected, the statistics of divorce is lower. For example, the statistics of divorce is twenty seven percent in Japan that has better than the west. Unfortunately, in Iran the statistics of divorce is high in large cities especially in Tehran (the north part of Tehran). In the north of Iran, this number has reached 25 percent that can have very dangerous consequences.
6. Ways in order to consolidate family
1. The first step to consolidate family is prevention. In other words, it is the appropriate, wise and logical selection of spouse. The exact selection of spouse with enough analysis is the first step for prevention from the disintegration of family. Today it is what the scientist of social sciences have interpreted it as '' equality in marriage'' and religious trains have interpreted it as '' Kaful'' meaning equal. Equality in marriage is related to the matter of religion, nationality, culture and education first and appearance and social positions. Hence, it is observed that equality is a remarkable and important basis in marriage and the Islam has emphasized on it. When there are a lot of differences about the selection of spouse in the aspects of thinking and cultural and social matters, the family life will have a lot of problems. Hence, the first matter is attention to the selection of spouse.
2. The second case is educational necessities. Training students and university students in the levels of high school and university should be done enough because some courses in high school and university about the matters of family and necessary trains about different aspects for the future of youths and the right selection of spouse are necessary and this affair should be paid attention by the government and educational system. Apart from educational centers, media have heavy responsibility. Group media, especially national media, should have more attention to family matters and movies and serials should be made to train the grounds of the consolidation of family.
The recognition of women and men toward spiritual, moral and physical differences has remarkable importance because the exact recognition differences, the acceptance of duties and responsibilities by couples and the division of duties in family can reduce differences in family life.
4. Persons need a pattern in order to continue their path and it is necessary that they follow a pattern from a family that is representative of affection, happiness, and success in the affair of marriage and the formation of family. It is good that the youths of our society consider an ideal family of the beginning of the Islam (Hazrat Ali and Hazrat Fateme) as a pattern.
5. One of the purposes of family formation to give birth to children to preserve generation. The responsibility acceptance of couples in training, supervision on the actions and behaviors of children and the meeting of their needs are necessary in order to establish comfort in family. Sometimes, the destiny of children and their actions may disintegrate the foundation of family and it results in the separation of couples. The implementation of religious orders about training righteous children and deepening the foundation of beliefs and religious values in family help to consolidate it.
6. Faithfulness of husband and wife toward each other and respecting the rights of each other are emphasized in verses and Islamic narrations and they are necessary affairs. Imam Ali (peace be upon him) states
جهادالمرئة حسن التبّعل
''The jihad of woman is to get along with her husband in a desirable and good way''.
« الکاد علي عياله کالمجاهد في سبيل الله »
A person that tries to meet the needs of his family is like a person that does jihad in the path of God''. Hence, when the point of views of women and men are based on this foundation, the foundation of a family becomes firmer than last day and no danger will threaten it.
7. Moderation and frugality in the life and prevention from prodigality and prudence in the family life keep the honor of family and they will be moral principles for children in the future.
8. The recognition of the weak points and the consistent evaluation of our actions and children and the awareness of dangers for family should be considered regularly and no neglect should happen about this. The mistakes of family members should be recognized as soon as possible and they should be solved. All orders and prohibitions as functions and religious orders should be considered and the behavior of family members should be evaluated according to them. Hence, such a family will not decline and disintegrate.
9. Sometimes, there may be contrasts between Iranian traditions, religious norms and beliefs and the role of different cultures can be seen clearly. We should relate these two point of views with open and realistic mind and consider Iranian culture within the framework of religious recommendations that will be active and permanent for all generations and eras and it should be observed as the map of the path of family and it should not be ignored.
10. Another important point is the matter tolerance. It means lack of difficult rules in thoughts and beliefs. Quran expresses about this area.
« ضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا لِّلَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا اِمْرَأَةَ نُوحٍ وَاِمْرَأَةَ لُوطٍ كَانَتَا تَحْتَ عَبْدَيْنِ مِنْ عِبَادِنَا صَالِحَيْنِ فَخَانَتَاهُمَا فَلَمْ يُغْنِيَا عَنْهُمَا مِنَ اللَّهِ شَيْئًا »
''Allah sets forth, for an example to the Unbelievers, the wife of Noah and the wife of Lut: they were (respectively) under two of our righteous servants, but they were false to their (husbands), and they profited nothing before Allah on their account''.
God mentions the wives of Hazrat Lut and Hazrat Nuh that were the wives of two righteous persons that became unbeliever, betrayed their husbands and because they were the wives of prophets, they were not tortured. Quran reminds important matter and mentions the wives of two prophets. Hazrat Nuh and Hazrat Lut were the great prophets of God, but their wives were unbeliever and did not believe in God. The prophets of God lived with women that were different with them in the most important matter, religion and beliefs and Quran says that they became unbeliever and did not believe in God at all.
Hence, it can be observed that there was a lot of tolerance in the dynasty of the prophet and the prophet of God lived in a house with a woman that was polytheist and unbeliever. This matter shows the importance of tolerance in families. Quran also mentions another example;
« وَضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا لِّلَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اِمْرَأَةَ فِرْعَوْنَ إِذْ قَالَتْ رَبِّ ابْنِ لِي عِندَكَ بَيْتًا فِي الْجَنَّةِ وَنَجِّنِي مِن فِرْعَوْنَ وَعَمَلِهِ »
''And Allah sets forth, as an example to those who believe the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she said: "O my Lord! Build for me, in nearness to Thee, a mansion in the Garden, and save me from Pharaoh and his doing''.
God mentions the name of the wife of Freon as an example for persons that have believed in God. The wife of Freon wants God to make her get rid of Freon and his actions and to send her to the heaven. A woman lives in the house of Freon as the wife of the tyrant ruler that believes in God and wants God to save him. But such a devout woman lived with her husband for years. Hence, it can be seen that devout persons with thoughts and beliefs had a lot of tolerance in last centuries.
During life stages, since there are natural differences between a couple, their tolerance decreases whereas Quran mentions the good examples of tolerance. Faithfulness, commitment, selflessness and love are the basic pillars of the consolidation of a family. According to the sacred verse of Quran, affection and mercy should be formed in families.
11. The activity of organizations about the area of consultation before and after marriage and their support have remarkable importance. Of course, these organizations have had done well.

Kinds of family

Family sociologists have mentioned different forms for family with looking back the past, analyzing historical documents and effects that are left from ancestors such as husband -and -wife family, extended family, compound family, multi-husband family, multi-wife family and …
Effects, historical documents and ancient witness that are left from ancestors in recognizing form of family in last era can help sociologists. The verses of Quran, especially verses that report the life of the prophet (peace of Allah be upon him and his descendants) can show family form in passing of time. Hence, it is decent that we take a look at the verses of Quran and with the help of divine messages, we can achieve family forms in the past.

Multi-wife family

A family that has several wives is called '' multi-wife family''. This form of family has a long history and its sings are seen in the life of some prophets. For example, the family of Hazrat Ibrahim (peace be upon him) is a multi-wife family. His first wife is Sare and his second wife is Hajar.
Family of Hazrat Suleiman (peace be upon him) is a multi-wife family as the prophet of the Islam (peace of Allah be upon him and his descendants) is a multi-wife family;
''يَا نِسَاءَ النَّبِيِّ مَن يَأْتِ مِنكُنَّ بِفَاحِشَةٍ مُّبَيِّنَةٍ يُضَاعَفْ لَهَا الْعَذَابُ ضِعْفَيْنِ ۚ وَكَانَ ذَٰلِكَ عَلَى اللَّهِ يَسِيرًا''
''O Consorts of the Prophet! If any of you were guilty of evident unseemly conduct, the Punishment would be doubled to her, and that is easy for Allah''.
''يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُل لِّأَزْوَاجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَاءِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِن جَلَابِيبِهِنَّ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَن يُعْرَفْنَ فَلَا يُؤْذَيْنَ ۗ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا''
''O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful''.
In the era of Quran descending, a multi-wife family was common and men were highly interested in marring again and having a multi-wife family. In fact, women were imagined as weak and unable creatures, did not have a lot of rights and were satisfied of a simple life.
Islam did not abolish that men had several wives and determined limitations and conditions so that women were not misused by men;
''وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَىٰ فَانكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُم مِّنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَىٰ وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ ۖ فَإِنْ خئثد ِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَلَّا تَعُولُوا''
''If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice''.
Since there were limitations and conditions for men that wanted to get married again so that they could behave their wives fairly, it prevented most of Muslims to get married and only men that could establish justice sufficed four wives.

A compound family

One of other forms of family in the past was a compound family. For example, when Hazrat Ibrahim (peace be upon him) got married again and formed a marital life with two wives, it formed a compound family. At the beginning of marital life of Hazrat Ibrahim with Sare, the form of his life was as a wife-and-husband family. But after Hazrat Ibrahim (peace be upon him) got married Hajar, his life changed to a compound family and Hazrat Ibrahim (peace be upon), Sare and Hajar lived together.
This form of family did not last so long and after Ismaeil was born, Hazrat Ibrahim (peace be upon him) had to have a husband and wife family and took Hajar and Ismaeil to a land that was called '' Mecca'' later.

Matriarch family

Historical documents show that there was matriarch family in the past. For example, family formation was matriarch in ancient Egypt. In this land, women could work and men kept house and did weaving and gave their income to their wives. This financial ability became the ground of power of women and one of conditions of marriage was that men obeyed their wives and it was known as a basic condition.
In the verses of Quran, there are signs of matriarch family in ancient Egypt. For example, family of Freon was a matriarch family. In this family, the remark of Asie was only acceptable remark and Freon had to surrender against her requests. Therefore, Asie prevented Freom from killing Hazrat Musa (peace be upon him) and considered Musa as stepson in her family;
'' وَقَالَتِ امْرَأَتُ فِرْعَوْنَ قُرَّتُ عَيْنٍ لِّي وَلَكَ ۖ لَا تَقْتُلُوهُ عَسَىٰ أَن يَنفَعَنَا أَوْ نَتَّخِذَهُ وَلَدًا وَهُمْ لَا يَشْعُرُونَ''
''The wife of Pharaoh said: "(Here is) joy of the eye, for me and for thee: slay him not. It may be that he will be use to us, or we may adopt him as a son." And they perceived not (what they were doing)''.
There are signs of power and independence of women in the story of Hazrat Yusef (peace be upon him). For instance, Zoleikh was not punished in spite of the fact that her husband was sure that she was a sinner and he wanted that his wife should be forgiven;
''يُوسُفُ أَعْرِضْ عَنْ هَٰذَا ۚ وَاسْتَغْفِرِي لِذَنبِكِ ۖ إِنَّكِ كُنتِ مِنَ الْخَاطِئِينَ''
''O Joseph, pass this over! (O wife), ask forgiveness for thy sin, for truly thou hast been at fault''.
The wonderful power of women in the time of Hazrat Yusef (peace be upon him), her husband had to accept request of Zoleikha and he ordered to imprison Hazrat Yusef (peace be upon him).
In the story of Umran, there are documents of the power of women in the history. For example, Umarn made decision about his destiny and child future and chose name of Maryam for her.
There are signs of rank and position of women in the story of Hazrat Suleiman (peace be upon him). In that era, Belgheis was a commander and under her support, women gained power and position. In that era, family formation was matriarchy and women had a prominent role in family management.

An extended family

There are at least three generations that include father, son and child that live together and father has absolute power.
This form of family was an ideal and desirable form until the half of the nineteenth century.
This form of family before industrial revolution was more common than other forms of family and in some regions, it was only form of family.
In the verses of Quran, documents show the existence of this form of family in the past. For example, in the story of the life of Hazrat Yaghub (peace be upon him), there are signs that the form of the life of Hazrat Yaghub (peace be upon him) was extended. In this story, the children of Hazrat Yaghub (peace be upon him) had animal husbandry, took their farm animals out for grazing and came back home at night. Therefore, when a group decided to take their sheep for grazing, they wanted that Yusef accompanied them and Hazrat Yaghub stated '' I am worried that they take Yusef because a wolf may eat him and you should not be aware of it''.
The exit of persons in group for work and provision of the expanses of the life was one of basic signs of family formation of Hazrat Yaghub (peace be upon him).
Moreover, their group travel for provision of food storage to Egypt is the sign of the existence of extended family of Hazrat Yaghub (peace be upon him).
The family of Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) is in the form of extended family. Hazrat Nuh (peace be upon him) lived with his children and wives and made such a big ship with their help.

Marriage

The word '' marriage'' and its derivations are words that are highly used in Quran. This word has different meanings in verses of Quran. In some verses, it means closeness and in other verses, it means likeness. Moreover, in other verses, it means same marriage;
''كَذَٰلِكَ وَزَوَّجْنَاهُم بِحُورٍ عِينٍ''
''So; and We shall join them to fair women with beautiful, big, and lustrous eyes''.
''أَوْ يُزَوِّجُهُمْ ذُكْرَانًا وَإِنَاثًا ۖ وَيَجْعَلُ مَن يَشَاءُ عَقِيمًا ۚ إِنَّهُ عَلِيمٌ قَدِير''ٌ
''Or He bestows both males and females, and He leaves barren whom He will: for He is full of Knowledge and Power''.
'' وَإِذْ تَقُولُ لِلَّذِي أَنْعَمَ اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَأَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيْهِ أَمْسِكْ عَلَيْكَ زَوْجَكَ وَاتَّقِ اللَّهَ وَتُخْفِي فِي نَفْسِكَ مَا اللَّهُ مُبْدِيهِ وَتَخْشَى النَّاسَ وَاللَّهُ أَحَقُّ أَن تَخْشَاهُ ۖ فَلَمَّا قَضَىٰ زَيْدٌ مِّنْهَا وَطَرًا زَوَّجْنَاكَهَا لِكَيْ لَا يَكُونَ عَلَى الْمُؤْمِنِينَ حَرَجٌ فِي أَزْوَاجِ أَدْعِيَائِهِمْ إِذَا قَضَوْا مِنْهُنَّ وَطَرًا ۚ وَكَانَ أَمْرُ اللَّهِ مَفْعُولًا''
''Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: "Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah." But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zaid had dissolved (his marriage) with her, with the necessary (formality), We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that (in future) there may be no difficulty to the Believers in (the matter of) marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessary (formality) (their marriage) with them. And Allah´s command must be fulfilled''.

Kinds of marriage

It should be considered that verses of Quran represent the existence of kinds of marriage in the history with considering means of descending of some verses and with taking a look at documents that are left from ancestors. Some kinds of marriages include:
Robbery marriage
Robbery marriage is to rob his favorite girl in spite of fact the she would not like to get married and stands against marital relationship. This way of marrying was common in the past and at the present, it is common in some regions and tribes.
Captive marriage
This kind of marriage was the result of war and enemy failed and they captured their women. There are signs of this kind of marriage at the beginning of the Islam;
َ''الُمحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ إِلَّا مَا مَلَكَتْ أَیْمَانُكُمْ''
We read about the cause of the sacred verse
''إنّ رسول الله (صلی الله علیه و آله و سلم) یومَ حُنَینٍ بَعثَ جیشاً إلی أوطاسَ ولَقِی عدواً فقاتَلوهم، فَظَهروا علیهم و أصابوا لهم سبایا، و کان ناسٌ من أصحابِ رسول الله (صلی الله علیه و آله و سلم) تَحرَّجوا من غشیانِهنَّ من أجل أزواجهنّ من المشرکین''
'' In the time of Hanin War, the prophet (peace of Allah be upon him and his descendants) sent a troop toward Utas. Muslims failed the foes. Then they captured some slaves and some of them were women. Muslims avoided marrying them because they had husbands and their husbands were polytheists.

Trade marriage

In this kind of marriage, a man finds his favorite wife through trade. This kind of marriage was common in India, Europe, northern America and Arab. This kind of marriage continued after the appearance of Islam as well and women that married in this way are called '' Om Valad'';
''وَأُحِلَّ لَكُم مَا وَرَاءَ ذلِكُمْ أَن تَبْتَغُوا بِأَمْوَالِكُم مُحْصِنِینَ غَیْرَ مُسَافِحِینَ''
''وَمَن لَّمْ يَسْتَطِعْ مِنكُمْ طَوْلًا أَن يَنكِحَ الْمُحْصَنَاتِ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ فَمِن مَّا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُم مِّن فَتَيَاتِكُمُ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ ۚ وَاللَّهُ أَعْلَمُ بِإِيمَانِكُم ۚ بَعْضُكُم مِّن بَعْضٍ ۚ فَانكِحُوهُنَّ بِإِذْنِ أَهْلِهِنَّ وَآتُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ مُحْصَنَاتٍ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحَاتٍ وَلَا مُتَّخِذَاتِ أَخْدَانٍ ۚ فَإِذَا أُحْصِنَّ فَإِنْ أَتَيْنَ بِفَاحِشَةٍ فَعَلَيْهِنَّ نِصْفُ مَا عَلَى الْمُحْصَنَاتِ مِنَ الْعَذَابِ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ لِمَنْ خَشِيَ الْعَنَتَ مِنكُمْ ۚ وَأَن تَصْبِرُوا خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ ۗ وَاللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ''
''If any of you have not the means wherewith to wed free believing women, they may wed believing girls from among those whom your right hands possess: And Allah hath full knowledge about your faith. Ye are one from another: Wed them with the leave of their owners, and give them their dowers, according to what is reasonable: They should be chaste, not lustful, nor taking paramours: when they are taken in wedlock, if they fall into shame, their punishment is half that for free women. This (permission) is for those among you who fear sin; but it is better for you that ye practise self-restraint. And Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful''.

Temporary marriage

In this kind of marriage, a woman has no alimony and does not inherit a man, but she has marriage portion and she should be paid marriage portion;
''وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ إِلَّا مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ۖ كِتَابَ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ ۚ وَأُحِلَّ لَكُم مَّا وَرَاءَ ذَٰلِكُمْ أَن تَبْتَغُوا بِأَمْوَالِكُم مُّحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحِينَ ۚ فَمَا اسْتَمْتَعْتُم بِهِ مِنْهُنَّ فَآتُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ فَرِيضَةً ۚ وَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ فِيمَا تَرَاضَيْتُم بِهِ مِن بَعْدِ الْفَرِيضَةِ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا حَكِيمًا''
''Also (prohibited are) women already married, except those whom your right hands possess: Thus hath Allah ordained (Prohibitions) against you: Except for these, all others are lawful, provided ye seek (them in marriage) with gifts from your property,- desiring chastity, not lust, seeing that ye derive benefit from them, give them their dowers (at least) as prescribed; but if, after a dower is prescribed, agree Mutually (to vary it), there is no blame on you, and Allah is All-knowing, All-wise''.
This kind of marriage was common at the beginning of Islam and the remark of Umar represents its legitimacy;
''متعتانِ کانتا علی عصرِ الرسولِ أنهی عنهما و أعاقبُ علیهما: متعة النساءِ و متعةُ الحجِّ''

Trading marriage

In this kind of marriage, if a boy wanted to marry his favorite daughter, he had to have his sister, daughter or brother marry the girl or boy of the opposite side. There are signs of this kind of marriage in Baluchestan and Keshmir still.

Trust marriage

In this kind of marriage, because guardian of a family wants a child with certain appearance and features, he has his wife marry a man that has such features and can have a child for him to have such attributes and appearance.

Group marriage

This kind of marriage was common in some regions. In this kind of marriage, several men lived with several women and a woman had a main husband and introduced her child to his child and a man had a main wife. In the time of Quran descending, this kind of marriage was common. Some men lived with a man and provided the alimony of a woman in group.

Exchanging marriage

This kind of marriage was common among people many years ago. In this kind of marriage, a man leaves his wife to another man and the man leaves his wife to the man.

Inheritance marriage

Before the Islam, women were sold and bought and they were considered as inheritance of dead persons like properties and goods. As a consequence, inheritors married women that were mahram to them (women that are close family members such as sister, mother and …), or they had them marry other men;
'' کان أهل المدینةِ فی الجاهلیةِ و فی أول الإسلام إذا ماتَ الرجلُ و له أمرأةٌ جاء ابنُه من غیرِها أو قرابتُه من عصبتِه فألقی ثوبَه علی تلک المرأةِ فصار أحق بها من نفسها و من غیره فإن شاء أن یَتزوَّجَها تَزوَّجَها بغیرِ صداقٍ إلا الصداقَ الذی أصدَقها المیتُ و إن شاء زوَّجها غیره و أخذ صداقَها و لم یُعطِها شیئا''
According to this custom of Arabic people in darkness era, Sehn Bin Abi Gheis, Asud Bin Khalf and Safvan Bin Omaye married wives of their fathers and sisters after their fathers died.
This kind of marriage prohibited with the appearance of Islam and it was considered as moharamat (women that are close family members such as sister, mother and …) ;
''يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمْ أَن تَرِثُوا النِّسَاءَ كَرْهًا ۖ وَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ لِتَذْهَبُوا بِبَعْضِ مَا آتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ إِلَّا أَن يَأْتِينَ بِفَاحِشَةٍ مُّبَيِّنَةٍ ۚ وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ۚ فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًا''
''O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may Take away part of the dower ye have given them,-except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good''
''وَلَا تَنكِحُوا مَا نَكَحَ آبَاؤُكُم مِّنَ النِّسَاءِ إِلَّا مَا قَدْ سَلَفَ ۚ إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَمَقْتًا وَسَاءَ سَبِيلًا''
''And marry not women whom your fathers married,- except what is past: It was shameful and odious,- an abominable custom indeed''.
''حُرِّمَتْ عَلَيْكُمْ أُمَّهَاتُكُمْ وَبَنَاتُكُمْ وَأَخَوَاتُكُمْ وَعَمَّاتُكُمْ وَخَالَاتُكُمْ وَبَنَاتُ الْأَخِ وَبَنَاتُ الْأُخْتِ وَأُمَّهَاتُكُمُ اللَّاتِي أَرْضَعْنَكُمْ وَأَخَوَاتُكُم مِّنَ الرَّضَاعَةِ وَأُمَّهَاتُ نِسَائِكُمْ وَرَبَائِبُكُمُ اللَّاتِي فِي حُجُورِكُم مِّن نِّسَائِكُمُ اللَّاتِي دَخَلْتُم بِهِنَّ فَإِن لَّمْ تَكُونُوا دَخَلْتُم بِهِنَّ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ وَحَلَائِلُ أَبْنَائِكُمُ الَّذِينَ مِنْ أَصْلَابِكُمْ وَأَن تَجْمَعُوا بَيْنَ الْأُخْتَيْنِ إِلَّا مَا قَدْ سَلَفَ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا''
''Prohibited to you (For marriage) are:- Your mothers, daughters, sisters; father´s sisters, Mother´s sisters; brother´s daughters, sister´s daughters; foster-mothers (Who gave you suck), foster-sisters; your wives´ mothers; your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives to whom ye have gone in,- no prohibition if ye have not gone in;- (Those who have been) wives of your sons proceeding from your loins; and two sisters in wedlock at one and the same time, except for what is past; for Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful''.