Joke: the conditions of marriage

When I left the office, it started snowing in flakes. I arrived the pedestrian and grounds had been white with snow. I folded up the neck of my overcoat, put my hand on my nose and started walking. The winter had just started. I was wondering if such cold weather continued, I would be in pain until the end of the winter.
When I entered the house, my father was picking up the clothes from the hanger. Whenever it snows, I am used to saying to my mother jokingly
'' Mom! The cold weather that kills old women has started''.
That day I opened my mouth to say such a sentence, but my mother forestalled and said '' it seems that it is the cold weather that kills unmarried boys, isn't it?''
I was only single person in our house. My mom made his snide remark after few years. Then I went to my room. I turned on the light and started staring at snow from behind the glass. After I got tired of staring at snow, I was trying to find out what makes the girls of my relatives tick in my fancy.
…Zari, Simin, Ozra, Mahush, Parvin, …….By the way, may mom have chosen a girl for me she said such remarks? I didn't interest in the girls of my relatives. I started spying on the girls of neighbors in my fancy
'' Susan? Mehri? Marzie? the daughter of Kabla Taghi? the daughter of Jam Panah? The daughter of …?''
If my mother had not entered the house, only God knows how long I would have been thinking about it. But when my mother entered my room, I lost my train of thought. As she was warming her hand on the kerosene stove, she said '' well, what's your idea about Zinat, the daughter of Bala Khan? ''
It is believed that there are reciprocal feelings, but it was proved for me on that day that there were reciprocal brains as well.
It seemed that my mom had understood that I was thinking about such matters…
I said '' my mom! I've said nothing about it so far, but you can do any actions that you'd like from now on. I beg you not to put me into trouble for God's sake''.
She said '' what trouble? Do you think that I've got my hair white in this neighborhood (I've lived in this neighborhood for years), but I don't know the girls of this neighborhood? The daughter of Bala Khan kills for you. Whenever I see her in the alley, I imagine that her hands are in your hands. I think you've been created to marry together''.
'' I agree to marry her, but does her father accept it?'' does her father accept that she marries like an employee like me?''
'' Why doesn't he accept it?... she's only the daughter of Mr. Bala Khan not the daughter of Atul Khan Rashti''.
'' However, Mr. Bala Khan is not a common person. He's a gentleman and high class and khan. He's rich as well. What other conditions would you like that he has?''
'' There's no need for you to think about such things. Leave anything to me''.
'' Yeah, now prepare lunch. I'm so hungry!!''
''Should I go and prepare lunch?''
'' Yeah, what would you like me to do?''
'' I wanted to go to the house of Mr. Bala Khan to talk to his wife, Mrs Zarrin''.
'' Do you want to talk to her right now?''
'' Not right now? I want to talk to her in the afternoon''.
'' I paused for a short time and said '' well, that's O.K''.
Mo mother started making lunch happily and I lied on the bed and was thinking about my future wife. As a matter of fact, it became colder moment to moment and I felt my bed became colder as well. It seemed the same cold weather (resulting from singleness) that my mom had said''.
When my mom came back from the house of Mr. Bala Khan, it was completely dark. It could be recognized at darkness that she was with long faces''.
'' Well, what's up?''
'' He entered the room like a bad-tempered person''.
'' Didn't I say that Mr. Bala Khan wasn't a common person? Well, what did he say?'' She answered as her voice was shivering.
''Because he wasn't at home, I talked to his wife. His daughter wasn't at home as well''.
'' Did she disagree?''
'' As a matter of fact, she didn't disagree, but she said '' the groom should cut relationship with his friends and find other new friends. He should be well-dressed. He should not come back home late at night''.
'' What else did they say?''
They asked whether you had a car and a house.
I answered '' he has an electric razor. God willing, he'll buy a car in the future. He is thinking of buying a house. He has some money in the bank. If he saves more money, he can buy a house in the future''.
'' What else did they say? ''
They said '' he is educated, but his salary is low''.
''؟ What else did they say''
They also said '' my daughter can't do chores, so he should employ a servant''.
''؟ What else did they say''
They also said '' you should let us think about it and talk to her father. We'll keep you informed of it three months later''. '' I said goodbye and came back''.
I said goodbye to my mom and hung out with my friends at that night so that I didn't have the wish of staying up at nigh if I got married''.
We didn’t hear from them for three months. According to minstrel decree, I was sent to the south. My mother packed furniture and wanted, Aghdas, the wife of Morteza, that lived in the next door to call Zarrin and to write us about the result.
I received the letter of Aghdas and understood that the wife of Mr. Bala Khan had sent a message at the last day of the third month '' if the groom doesn't find new friends, it will be O.K., but he should have other conditions''.
Few months passed and a letter was received and it had been written in the letter '' the wife of Mr. Bala Khan had said that if you do not be well-dressed, it would be O.K, but you should have other conditions''.
Several months passed and a letter was received again and reminded
'' The wife of Mr. Bala Khan had said that if you did not come back home soon at night, it would be O.K, but you shouldn't be late because their child might feel lonely. But you should have other conditions''.
Time was elapsing so quickly. The letter of Aghas was received once in six months and in each letter, one of conditions was omitted.
'' The wife of Mr. Bala Khan came to our house and said to me '' there's no need for car because streets are full of cars and if he doesn't have a car, I will be more comfortable, but he should have other conditions''.
''Today I saw Zinat at the alley and she had been too thin and said '' I try to get along with his low salary, but he should employ a servant for me''.
I don't know properly how many years it passed, but I know that the daughter of Mr. Bala Khan had been in an age that we named '' old maid'' in Tehran.
But the people of the south name it '' left at home'' and girls in such an age should be realistic and shouldn't think about getting married and whenever the ring of house is voiced, their hear starts beating…''.
Little by little I was trying to forget the story because Aghdas wasn't sending letters any more …
My life was passing in its usual process until I received a letter that I had not seen any letters in such a hand writing.
I opened it in a hurried way. It had been written in the letter

''Dear Mr. Borhan Pur:

Hi, I want to tell you that we don't need servants in order to marry together because we learned all activities of home such as cooking, sewing, make up and embroidery in housecraft class and I have a diploma for all of them.
I'm waiting for your answer, answer, answer,…
Zinat''
Next day when the mailman emptied the box of our city, my letter was among other letters. I had written in the letter

'' Dear Zinat:

I read the letter that you had sent. But I didn't understand who you meant from name '' Mr. Borhan Pur''. If you mean Mr. Ahmad Borhan Pur that is studying the first grade of elementary school, he isn't ready for such a thing and I'm his father. There isn't another single boy in our home.
Say hello me to your father and mother.
Ghorbanali Borhan Pur
By the way, I forgot to tell you that after I was sent to the south, two or three months later I got familiar with a girl living in Shiraz with black eyes and eyebrow. She had no problem with my friends and appearance and didn't want any cars, houses, salary and lands. More importantly, her mother and father weren't '' Mr. Bala Khan'' and '' Zarrin''.